Internet Trolls Impress NOBODY

Sound familiar?

I think the second and fourth panels on this excellent comic strip by Scott Meyer can easily be applied to Internet trolls — you know, the dickwads who always have something nasty to say in online forums and in comment threads. Do read the whole thing to get the full message.

How to Impress NOBODY

Image embedded with the author’s permission.

Interesting Links, September 25, 2011

Here are links I found interesting on September 25, 2011:

  • Perry’s Bad Night – THIS is pretty funny. Gail Collins says, "Gloom pervades the land. Some people believe it’s the economy. Others blame the weather. I think it’s because the country is gradually coming to grips with the fact that Mitt Romney is going to be the Republican nominee for president.' Read the rest.

The Pros and Cons of a Bad Haircut

An attempt to make myself feel better about a serious bad hair situation.

On Tuesday afternoon, I got my hair cut.

I told her to take off about half the length of my hair. (I like my hair short.) She started well — for a moment, I actually saw the Maria I like to see in the mirror. But then she lost control. She kept cutting. And cutting. And cutting.

I was afraid to make her stop. I was afraid one side would be left longer than the other.

She took off about 90% of my hair. It lay in piles on the floor.

I left there with the shortest hair I’ve ever had in my life.

I was born with more hair on my head.

So I figured I’d try to console myself by listing the pros and cons of having hair this short for the first time in my life.

Pros Cons
After 30 years, I finally get to see what color my hair really is. I have to see what color my hair really is.
It should be really easy to dye my hair. If I dye my hair, I’ll have to do it again in two weeks when it’s twice as long.
I don’t have to comb my hair. I don’t have enough hair to comb.
I don’t have to deal with tangles. I don’t have enough hair to tangle.
I can check the health of my scalp. I can see my scalp.
I don’t have to worry about hat-head. I have to wear a hat.
I finally get to wear some of my hats. I have to wear a hat.
Short hair is really nice in hot weather. It’s autumn.
I look like a very healthy cancer survivor. I look like a cancer survivor.
(I didn’t really have cancer.) People I meet are uncomfortable, wondering whether they should ask about my cancer treatment.
People will be convinced that I got my helicopter flight training in the military. I was never in the military.
I won’t have to get my hair cut again for at least three months. I’d rather have hair to cut.
I have an excuse not to go out in public. I’m too embarrassed to go out in public.

Can I think of any more? I probably will. I’ll add them above.

Oddly, I just joked with a Facebook friend who is hair-challenged — not his choice — that hair is overrated. I take that back. I wish I had my hair back.

And no. I won’t share a picture. I’ll be lying low for a while.

Interesting Links, September 14, 2011

Here are links I found interesting on September 14, 2011: